The Voice

Methed-out Santas, My Top 6, and Christina Aguilera.
The Voice
By Valyrie Mia Stone

Hey guys! I haven't talked about The Voice since the Blinds, so I thought I'd bring it back up. The Finals are next week (exciting!) and I have to say, I am really dissapointed in the final 3. I mean, I expressed my dislike for Nicholas Davis from the very begining, and I stand by my statement-

Speaking of “wow”, there was Nicholas David. First off, I automatically don’t like people with 2 first names. Second, he looks like a methed-out Santa. I was like, wow, anyone this weird must be able to sing. Nope. All the back-ally-behind-a-Toys-R-Us-drug-dealer with none of the talent.

He was the only one of the top three that I ended up posting about because, honestly, I didn't think the other two were memorable enough to make it past the battle rounds. I only talked about him becasue I had something kinda funny to say. So I'll say it now.

Terry McDermot is only this successful because of his adorable child. What, did I offend you? Well, sorry, but it's true. Now, listen, he's good. But he isn't a star. He would have been super popular in the '90s. He's got good pitch and makes you really enjoy yourself, but not in a god-this-person-is-talented-Adele-kind-of-way, but in a what-a-good-song-kind-of-way. He's getting votes because he seems like such a good father and he's got a cool accent, not because he's a star.

Cassadee Pope is good. I don't have a joke here, I simply misjudged her from the begining. I didn't think she was that great, and I hate it when people who already had a band or some kind of stepping stone goes on a show like this, but she really is talented. But she doesn't deserve to be in the top 3.

"So who does?" you ask me. Well, I'm glad you asked. Here is my top 6, and subsequently my top 3 (in order from 6th place,  unless otherwise specified)

Cody Belew-
          Now, he wasn’t the best person on this, but first off, he’s just so entertaining that I don’t care and second, he needs to do a duet with Melanie “I-love-you-so-much” Martinez. Seriously, the fourth best performance was “Rhythm of Love”, mostly because of the harmony between these two.

Tie!- MarrissaAnn and Paulina
          Now, some of you may be asking, “who are they?”. Well, they didn’t make it very far, but I see potential. 5^th place potential, but still, I’d just like to see what they can do.

Michaela Paige
          I had some trouble deciding where to put her, she’s good enough for the top 3, but not quite as ready as the others. But I still see her putting out music later in life.


Chevonne
          I love her. Not only is she talented, but she is a star. I love her and she had better make an album at some point and prove the Voice wrong (she didn’t even make it to the Live shows!). I’m looking forward to you, honey. Also, I put Titanium as her video, and Avery was also talented. Pretend I put him in with MarrissaAnn and Paulina. But the comments in this video are so mean to Chevonne! And I like mean! But they were so hurtful and rude, I just wanted to hit them in the head with a tennis racket and rush Chevonne to a recording studio. (My computer started getting wierd, so I had to put the remainder of the videos way below. I don't understand this computer.)              


1^st Place!- Amanda Brown
          You may be wondering why I am putting 1^st place before 2^nd. Well, that’s because I wanted to finish with Melanie, but I want her to come in second place. That way, she can get a record deal outside of the constrictions of winning a competition. She can have more creative control. Anyway, Amanda is so good. Here’s proof (the third best performance-and a close third at that):



2^nd Place!- Melanie Martinez.
          I think this is pretty self-explanatory. She simply deserves it. (Plus she has the top 2 performances: In no particular order- Toxic and Too Close) Here’s my previous review of her:

And then there was Melanie Martinez. Melanie “Foot Tambourine” Martinez. Melanie “Daphne Guinness Hair” Martinez. She sounds like a haunting Minnie Mouse, and it’s not just the bow in her hair. I hope she wins, I really do. I would so buy her album if she made one. I would love to hear her do Smooth Criminal. But, really, she could sing me the Atlanta Phonebook and I’d be happy. Wow, just wow.

 But, good news, even though she didn’t make it to 2^nd place, she still has an EP coming out! Yay! Hair bows and tooth gaps unite!

 

I wanted to take a moment to verbally slap Christina Aguilera. Honey, I know your career is tanking- like, soooooo bad- but still, you are getting so annoying. Now, I have always loved you, and I’ve stood up for you many times, but you are making it very hard to defend you. For example, Melanie has two wonderful performances, and you complement the prop guy. Both times. When it wasn’t even his idea (thank you, Adam, for calling her out on that). What is that? I know that you are running out of cheap Japanese fans and alien equipment that you wear as a hat, but that doesn’t mean you can be rude. People can be talented even if they aren’t on your team. And once your team got booted off completely, you just hated Adam’s team. You seriously aren’t even making sense anymore. What did he ever do to you? (I likeyou Adam, despite the fact that you have comically expensive ripped shirts).

                                                                   -Kisses, V.